self-esteem

Is Low Self Esteem Holding You Back? Say No to Low!

“The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.” – Mark Twain

It is often not easy to squash low self-esteem. Your self-esteem stems from things that have happened to you in your life and your own feelings about whether or not you are good enough. There are many ways to improve your self esteem, but the first thing you need to do is discover where your self esteem is low. News flash – nothing is as easy as it first may seem. Low self esteem is a like cancer, it can eat away at you and immobilize you. …

How To Be Intriguing

I often feel quite uninteresting, sometimes to the point of being dull beyond belief.  I spend a lot of time writing, which, by its very nature, is alone time.  Then after I have written something, I spend a lot of time trying to figure out how to make people interested in it.  Unfortunately, not everyone is interested in what I have to say.  In fact, most of what I have to say matters to me, but not to the rest of the world.  So I was lucky to find this video from Sam Horn that inspired and motivated me.  My catch phrase is “See Be Do – See it! Be it! Do it!” – works for me, what works for you?

Sam Horn is the author of  Got Your Attention?: How to Create Intrigue and Connect with Anyone, which provides great insights into how to be intriguing in life and business. Some of the key ideas she puts forth include: Ask  questions based on pertinent facts

Did you know…? People like to hear interesting facts – it not only provides them with information but it makes you appear well-educated and informed.

Make what you say memorable and repeatable. Do you have a catch-phrase, a favourite quote, story or fact?  Use it –make your talk viral.

Show and ask.  Don’t show and tell.  Make sure people relate.  Make a proposal, provide a solution, describe a problem and ask how the other person relates to it. A

Ask lots of questions. Engage others by asking questions – Has this ever happened to you? Did you ever…? Have you experienced..?  

Keep abreast of current trends, news, and stories New information is good information.  Be hip.  Be amusing. Be interesting.

Ability Quotes – Use Your Abilities

We all have unique abilities and talents.  Whether we decide to use our ability is another matter altogether.  Whether it is a natural ability or a learned one does not matter, how we use it does matter.  The sad thing is that just having a talent or ability does not make it valuable or useful.  There are literally hundreds of abilities, talents and skills and we all have at least a few of them.

The superior man is distressed by the limitations of his ability; he is not distressed by the fact that men do not recognize the ability he has. ~ Confucius

To be granted some kind of usable talent and to be able to use it to the fullest extent of which you are capable this, to me, is a kind of joy that is almost unequaled. ~ Lawrence Welk

Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there. ~ John Wooden

Ability will never catch up with the demand for it. ~ Malcolm S. Forbes

The most interesting income you will receive from doing good work is the increased ability to do better work. ~ F.D. Van Amburgh

Big jobs usually go to the men who prove their ability to outgrow small ones. ~  Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our strengths are our tools, our personal reality. Our weaknesses are only what we are not. ~ Joe Batten

Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. ~  John Wooden

Intelligence is quickness to apprehend as distinct from ability, which is capacity to act wisely on the thing apprehended. ~ A.N. Whitehead

We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done. ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The world cares very little about what a man or woman knows; it is what a man or woman is able to do that counts. ~ Booker T. Washington

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. ~ Helen Keller

Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it. ~ Lou Holtz

The maturing of any complex talent requires a happy combination of motivation, character, and opportunity. Most talent remains undeveloped. ~ John Gardner

If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life. ~ Abraham Maslow

Do a common thing in an uncommon way. ~  Booker T. Washington

People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don’t know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to. ~ George Herbert Allen

Discipline is the refining fire by which talent becomes ability. ~ Roy L. Smith

For better or worse, you must play your own instrument in the orchestra of life. ~  Dale Carnegie

It isn’t bragging if you can do it. ~ Dizzy Dean

Ambition may have to advertise, but ability advertises itself. ~ F.D. Van Amburgh

No army can withstand the strength of an idea whose time has come. ~ Victor Hugo

Studies indicate that the one quality all successful people have is persistence. They’re willing to spend more time accomplishing a task and to persevere in the face of many difficult odds. There’s a very positive relationship between people’s ability to accomplish any task and the time they’re willing to spend on it. ~ Dr. Joyce

No one rises to low expectations. ~ Les Brown

Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. if I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it.  On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it, even if I may not have it at the beginning. ~ Mahatma Gandhi

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito. ~ Unknown

Knowing what you can not do is more important than knowing what you can do. In fact, that’s good taste. ~ Lucille Bal

Continuous effort, not strength or intelligence is the key to unlocking our potential. ~ Liane Cardes

Ability will never catch up with the demand for it. ~ Malcolm S. Forbes

It is a fine thing to have ability, but the ability to discover ability in others is the true test. ~ Elbert Hubbard

It is not your aptitude, but your attitude, that determines your altitude. ~ Zig Ziglar

Ability is of little account without opportunity. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte

As simple as it sounds, we all must try to be the best person we can: by making the best choices, by making the most of the talents we’ve been given. ~ Mary Lou Retton

Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies. ~ Mother Teresa

Impossible is a word to be found only in the dictionary of fools. ~ Unknown

It is for us to pray not for tasks equal to our powers, but for powers equal to our tasks. ~ Helen Keller

If you possess marked ability, it will show in your work. Capable people do not need to talk about themselves. Make your service so good that it will be your press agent. ~ F.D. Van Amburgh

Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they’re yours. ~ Richard Bach

It’s not what you’ve got; it’s what you use that makes a difference. ~  Zig Ziglar

It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts. ~ John Wooden

Men take only their needs into consideration, never their abilities. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte

We cannot direct the wind but we can adjust the sails. ~ Dolly Parton

My strength is the strength of ten, because my heart is pure. ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson

Natural ability without education has more often raised a man to glory and virtue than education without natural ability. ~ Cicero

Never do things others can do and will do if there are things others cannot do or will not do. ~ Amelia Earhart

Contrary as it may seem, most people have more ability for their work than they have ambition to do it. ~ F.D. Van Amburgh

A problem is a chance for you to do your best. ~ Duke Ellington

There is a great deal of unmapped country within us. ~ George Eliot

When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. ~ John Ruskin

Alas for those who never sing, but die with all their music in them. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

No talent can survive the blight of neglect. ~ Edgar A. Whitney

They are able because they think they are able. ~ Virgil

The real tragedy of life is not in being limited to one talent, but in the failure to use the one talent. ~ Edgar W. Work

Just do what you do best. ~ Red Auerbach

Natural abilities are like natural plants; they need pruning by study. ~ Francis Bacon

We all have ability. The difference is how we use it. ~ Stevie Wonder

Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment. ~ Baltasar Gracian

You are the only person on earth who can use your ability. ~  Zig Ziglar

Ability is a poor man’s wealth. ~ M. Wren

~

10 Reasons Perfectionism Sucks

“Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” ~ Salvador Dali

Being a perfectionist is a curse. It doesn’t do you any good. I promise.And I should know. Being a perfectionist has been the reason for my successes and my failures, but I think if I were to tally them up, perfectionism has led to more failures than successes. The bad news is perfectionism may be genetic, an article in the Wall Street Journal, Inside the Minds of the Perfectionists – WSJ.com, says that scientists now believe that genetic factors, more than anything else, influence whether or not you are a perfectionist.

“They say that nobody is perfect. Then they tell you practice makes perfect. I wish they’d make up their minds.”-Winston Churchill

It makes sense to me. I have a daughter who is cursed with it, has been since she was tiny. I have always been cursed with it. I used to be proud of it. But now, from the vantage point of more years of experience than I want to admit to, I have to say that perfectionism has hindered me more than it has helped. I only have to look at all the projects I have discarded because they didn’t meet my own standards, which I always set high enough to give me an excuse to give up.

Ten Reasons Perfectionism Sucks

  1. Nobody is perfect
  2. Perfection is in the eye of the beholder
  3. Perfectionism is an excuse for not finishing things
  4. Perfectionism is an excuse for not taking risks
  5. Perfectionism leads to ulcers
  6. Perfectionism is immobilizing
  7. Perfectionism is self-abuse
  8. Perfectionists are never content
  9. Perfectionism never got nobody nothing
  10. Perfection is an illusion

Doing things well is wonderful and important but setting unrealistic expectations and expecting that things always be perfect can be a trap.  Bottom line, nobody and nothing is perfect and when we expect that our own work, children, spouses, and pets be perfect we are setting ourselves up for failure.  Likewise, when we demand perfection of ourselves it can create more of a hindrance than a help.  Do what you love, enjoy yourself and don’t worry if what you do lives up to some arbitrary set of standards.

Perfect the art of non-perfection and you will find peace, happiness, and success.  Embrace your flaws and you can conquer the world.

 

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